“You Deserve Better Than Me.” Yes, I Do.

Uh oh. It’s happened again. Let’s unpack together the “you deserve better than me” chat. 

A common break up tool in the situationship ending toolbox is the “you deserve better than me” line. This line smacks you in the face harder than a cheap white wine hangover (and we all know how much they pack a punch.) But why does it appear over and over again? Do they think we want to hear it? Do they think we’ll feel better being reminded that we could be with someone else? Because no, Alex. We like you, we pick you, we want you! Sure, we could fantasize about an ideal mate who ticks every box on the imaginary list, but that’s not real life. We’re all just buzzing about in our perfectly imperfect ways. 

Could it be as simple as your intimate other being intimidated by your success? Can we both not be vibin’ on each other's victories? Will we ever have a real answer to why “you deserve better than me” is the chosen alternative to an honest conversation? Who knows. One thing is certain though. Hearing this line over and over again is only good for one damn thing: learning how to self-soothe and get back to loving yourself faster than finishing a tub of ice cream. Okay, maybe after one small tub. Or at least after a few of our other tried and tested break up rituals, including a dramatic meme tag moment shared between friends, journaling, or buying yourself your favourite bagel (mmm). Maybe all of the above over and over again.

And then, suddenly, once you’ve picked yourself up, dusted yourself off, and given enough motivational speeches to yourself in the mirror, something pretty magical tends to happen. You realise you do deserve better than getting the crumbs from someone. As the wise Florence Given preaches “crumbs can’t feed me, I want the cake!”. 

For anyone needing this: 

YOU DO DESERVE BETTER! 

You are the love of your own life. You can take yourself on dates, you can make yourself happy, you can treat your own body with the love and compassion it so very much deserves. It’s time to direct that kindness inwards. Because damn, it’s better to be alone than with someone who doesn’t light your fire. 

If you’re all about taking matters into your own hands and wanting to give your own body the same love you so freely give others, SHOP THE VUSH SELF LOVE RANGE and remind yourself that you come first.